The Days of Yore

Do you ever think about the days of yore? Let’s be honest; it’s hard not to. We look back and think about a simpler time perhaps or a time where the world felt right. We think about what our grandparents taught us about what the days were like way before we were born and it’s hard not to wonder what life would have been like for us then, not the hard work of tilling new land, or surviving on very little, but the simplicity of not having certain elements that can over complicate life. As we move through life now, it can be more and more difficult not to compare the past to the present, yet we need to be careful about our comparisons and their impact on those around us. 

I have often thought about the ways the world was or felt to me growing up. Complicated, yes, but also free in some ways. Days of growing up on a farm and learning from my grandpa were some of my best years. Picking peas in the garden with my grandma or spending entire summers gallivanting on my grandparents’ property. It all seemed so good in those moments. Don’t get me wrong, there were really hard times too, but the essence of my time on the farm and acreage with both sets of my grandparents can’t be beat. I distinctly remember laughing while chasing moths out in the garden (a penny for getting the small ones, and a whole dollar for getting the big ones), collecting feathers (my absolute favourite thing to do), the smell of late night homemade hot chocolate and chocolate chip banana bread. I remember the hard work of living on a pig farm, the early morning and after school chores, all while playing every sport I could. The way my grandpa would come alongside and teach me how to use the equipment (it was more of a show and off you go), and the breakfasts and lunches we had sitting around my grandparents’ table after an early morning of sending pigs to market or a full morning of bedding and sorting pigs. I loved sitting around that table and listening to the stories my grandpa shared. He loved baseball and his farm. He loved his grandkids beyond measure and I am so grateful I got to hear what was so important to him when he was young.  

Now here is where I have to be careful. My own children have not had the same experiences;  they have always lived in a village of about 800 people. They do not have the same ability to gain joy or insight from experiences like I had, and sometimes, that makes me feel sad for them. Then I remember that they are experiencing their own lives through the lens of where we have decided to raise them. I am thankful for small town living because it has afforded our children some very valuable things including safety, a sense of community, and the ability to learn from those who have spent years making this village what it is. I also know that living in a village of 800 can be difficult, especially for teens.

They have access to amazing services like an outdoor swimming pool, a hall, an arena, a riding arena (though neither of them ride), tennis courts and more. They don’t have the same access as what someone in the city has, but I think that’s what makes the experiences here unique. You have to get outside, find friends, and create moments for yourself without the planning from an adult or the ease of buildings simply existing like movie theatres. When my kids were young it was easy to say get outside and make some friends! But as teens it looks a little different. They don’t have the space to go and sit and just be when they need a moment alone. On the farm I would walk a few kilometers to my absolute favorite place and sit on a rock overlooking a pond and that did wonders for my soul. I also recognize that living in a small town can be difficult because you have to travel more for activities outside the world of school sports, but what I have also seen is the power of minds working together to make more services available to small communities and rural areas. These are the elements that I highlight in our home so that my kids can see that small town living is what you make it. 

I know that my kids, who are almost ready to fly the coop will not have the same experiences as me. I also know that they live in a different age where technology is bursting at the seams and growth in that area is exponential. They are not living in my childhood world where cell phones only existed if they were the size of your head and you were at the top of a hill trying to get a signal. Now my phone tells me exactly where a satellite is to get service (cool feature, but wow). This is also why I have a hard time hearing things that start with kids these days and follow with something negative. They are not living in the same society that we experienced, and therefore, we cannot expect them to have the same types of experiences. What we can do is continue to share our own stories, encourage them to choose simple even if it’s only momentarily, teach them, and love them exactly where they are at. It’s not kids these days, it’s just a change in life and society. Kids these days are doing the best they can just like we did. Let’s come alongside them and build some of the days of yore. Give them new experiences that are unique to them in their world. Build the capacity for them to see life both with and without the hardships of the space and time that they are existing in. Mostly though, just love them exactly as they are.